Reasons Why I Am Not A Hipster #1, #2

Some backstory: For weeks now I've been trying to defend myself against a constant onslaught of hipster accusations. When my arguments failed to be accepted by the slanderer, I sought comfort in the opinions of my friends, who turned out to be a pack of Judases. Reader, I cannot stress this enough: I am no such trendy thing. It's a filthy lie. And so, with all the internet as my witness, I unveil a new feature on "That's What She Said": Reasons Why I Am Not A Hipster. I hope you enjoy.

Reason #1: I can easily put my hands in my jean pockets. Even the tightest pair. Suck it, nerds.

Whachu gon' do with all that ass? All that ass inside yo jeans?

Reason #2: Why yes, that was a Black Eyed Peas reference in my blog post. Thanks for noticing.

(Look forward to my companion pieces "Reasons Why I AM A Hipster." Coming soon!)

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